It's been a while

I know, I know, it's been a while since I've posted a message. My blog has become a bit stagnant (like most blogs), but it's mostly because I'm either not near a computer when a thought strikes me or nothing interesting happens

Anyhoo, I've been wallowing in my own misery (again) for the last couple of months. Depressed about school (will it ever end), the lack of free time (and money), lack of a good woman (hell, I'd settle for a bad one right now) in my life, etc. A friend of mine, as well as relatives, put the blame squarely on me for my solitude. I suppose that they still don't understand that some people are just in the wrong place at the wrong time every single fucking day.

Here's a good example. I was eating at a Chik-Fil-A last night before going to a study group (I'll get back to the study group). It's pretty noisy due to two tables of kids. One of the tables clears out and I say to the really cute blonde chick in front of me "wow, it got quiet after they left." She smiles and says "now we need to get rid of the rest of them." After the other table clears out, we start talking and she doesn't want kids. I was ready to ask her to marry me right there, but I kept my cool and the conversation going. She has been having the same problem as I have of finding someone that doesn't want kids, but the inevitable "the guy I'm seeing now. . ." eventually came out. I tried to at least swap phone numbers (so she can keep me in her queue in case she gets bored with the current guy), but she didn't want to do that. I can see that it COULD cause problems if the dude found out about me, but I was heart broken. I went from "this is the one" to "my life sucks even more now" within a matter of seconds.

Sometimes I wish I were dead.